April 3, 2022

Lauren Galli

Galli Gripes: Stop Shaming and One-Upping My Posts, Bro!

posting on social media

There was a time when I posted on my social media sites regularly — even several times per day. However, in the past two years, I have gone ALMOST radio silent. Why? Because I am sick and tired of being called out for every single word I post.

If I post to say I’m tired of something, someone whines about how they are more tired of it than I am.

If I write a heartfelt post about families suffering during the pandemic, people wax poetic about how wonderful they are.

It seems like no matter what I have to say, people have something to say back.

An Unsettling and Annoying Trend

But I suppose this is the way of the world these days. We live in an era of one-uppers, people who try to overshadow and diminish your accomplishments, woes, and feelings by bragging about and embellishing their own.

I would love to say this behavior is specific to social media, but it goes beyond the behind-the-screen keyboard warrior realm. It happens in person, too.

Have you ever told someone you are exhausted, and they responded with something like, “You’re too young to be tired?” I’m talking about that sort of thing.

The past six months have been BRUTAL for me. Two people very close to me are dramatically ill, my day job is emotionally demanding and stressful, and I never sleep very well. I have been struggling.

Due to the state of the world, I keep all of it to myself. I do express myself to the people closest to me quite often, but I have managed to keep everything out of the public eye. I do not want to post that I am having a hard time because of the ridiculous online backlash that I might incur.

Certainly, there would be people who are ultimately supportive, offering platitudes, prayers, and the like. Yet I know there will be one or two people who have a story about how their life is worse than mine or how my life could be much worse. They will say I need to be respectful of the suffering happening in Ukraine and be thankful that I am not in that situation (and OF COURSE, I am). They will ruin it for the people with heartfelt and inspiring things to say.

Bad Days Happen; Don’t Let Other People Make You Feel Worse

It feels like we are not allowed to have a bad day anymore — or when we do, we can’t talk about it because someone may have had a more dreadful day.

Let me make this clear: another person’s suffering does not diminish your own.

If you are having health problems and you want to talk about it, do not listen to the haters who tell you that you should be thankful you do not have more severe issues.

I’m here to tell you something…

You can be sick. You can be tired. You can have a bad day.

People should be able to talk to each other about their issues without having to worry about being ridiculed. If you are in the same boat and have something to talk about but feel you cannot, talk to me. I’ll listen. Until then, find solace in the people who matter. You could also do what I do and talk to your dog.

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